Being Dawns Truth

Photo of Kathryn Nelson Herczeg

Educator, Wife, Mother, Grandmother, Consummate Friend

Character is like a beautiful sunset:
We know when we've seen it; and
It's face fills us with awe. Character
Is what we become as we live out
Our gifts. It's how we treat each other;
A door held open vs slammed shut;
Character is the vast difference
Between being good and seeming
To do good things. Being dawns
Truth as its morning garments
While seeming runs exhausted--
Never quite certain what to wear;
You run into beautiful sunsets when
You're not looking; like the day
I first found you.

                                           1999 Connie Nelson Ahlberg
                                           All Rights Reserved.

Like Luscious Grasses Left

Tall Grass - Lyme Park, England - Wikipedia

Like Luscious Grasses Left

Dad, we are

Like luscious grasses left

To go to seed—

So swaying taller still,

I believe,

We choke out the weeds.

By Connie Nelson Ahlberg



Luminous Soul - Luminous Heart

The last time I talked to my friend and former hair dresser, Susan Fisher, she was worried about someone else.

She said a great deal has happened in Mary’s family (not her real name); you should call her.  But she didn’t reveal what had been told to her in confidence—Susan Fisher was not that kind of person.

Since her Bible was her best friend, she respected others who may have divulged their private hearts while sitting elevated in her salon chair. For her, secrets went simply from one chest cavity to another.

I enjoyed my time with Susan; her business, called Hidden Cove, was a treasure no matter what the address. Since I was a starving artist, she offered to sell my humble prose in a basket on a stand or table in her beauty shop. She would save the money for me.

We were in a business group together, seeking to give other members tips on possible business contacts. We gave speeches on what we were about, and offered incentives for our respective businesses.

But what Susan did doesn’t tell who she was. She had an open heart and a faith that comforted and consoled. Her spiritual walk was central to her life.  She had vibrant red hair (the latest tint), and a spirit of inclusion. She wasn’t a prude, either, loving to laugh at life which is as good as any hair tonic. That was a truth she carried.

But things were never smooth for long. She battled both breast cancer and kidney disease. And as a proprietor of a small business, it was hard to get and keep good health care if you had a preexisting conditions. (No personal mandate then, nor that much sympathy if you weren’t under a corporate umbrella.)

Inadequate medications, not the better ones that would have worked, had caused her body to reject a kidney she received, resulting in kidney failure. 

I offered to write a letter to her Congressman requesting help with health coverage for her. I believe he came through for her.

Her home was like a doll house, clean, sweet, and dear.  Her beauty shop, her business, was organized and inviting. She was as gracious as The Prince of Peace. 

She had a luminous inner being, and an open door.

Her family relationships weren’t perfect just like the families of the customers she served weren’t perfect. But you became a kin, or certainly a friend, as you shared your walk in life as the latest tint and rinse were poured on your head. She always put a little Jesus in your hair—and you just can’t get that everywhere.

Susan Fisher “flew up” (to heaven) last August.

Heroines' Transcendence

Morning Glory Close-up Wikipedia

Heroines transcend with quiet or loud deliberation;

Some ascend with screams of anguish

For lives taken in a physical struggle

They were too small to win;

Heroines transcend voices that said you

Can't or won't;

That small businesses fail

And you'll never be a CEO;

Which forced many to go and pound signs

Into their own doors where even doubters

Are forced to read them;

Heroines finish years of study

To knock on male doors and say

I'm as qualified as you

To come in;

Heroines can live simple lives--

Or so they seem,

Until you see the sky

Lit up behind them

With love or loss, accomplishment and sacrifice;

They transcend illnesses;

Knowing when they have to give in and rest

And when they can carry on:

"I might miss something," they say;

Heroines see the truth

And own it and laugh at simple joys;

Transcendence has become

A part of them like shining skin

And holiness they prayed

And courage they lived

And love they know. 

Written in 1998 by Connie Nelson Ahlberg

Honoring Susan Fisher - Luminous Heart/Luminous Soul

2/17/1948 - 8/21/2011

As If God Prepared You

                  As If God Prepared You

                              A Tribute to a Young Father

As If God prepared you--

You seem to know

How to hold a baby

Until he's grown;

Our little son has such a sold tree

That barely sways with any breeze!

Stable, calm,

A favorite lap to climb on;

A mother catches secret scenes:

Baby kisses; a father's dreams;

Enduring sweetness for a boy to hold

And give his son when he is old;

A devoted father is a blessing

Way before baby's begun;

Giving the greatest gift to his wife:

The love that grew a son;

 A happy little boy

 Never mysteriously grows,

 And as if God prepared you--

 Darling, You Seem to Know.

 1998 Connie Nelson Ahlberg
  All Rights Reserved.

                                                                                                                                                           

                                                                                                   

The Mist of Moisture

Luna Moth in Tokyo, Japan

"Think of grief as the mist of moisture on the face of a flower."  Connie Nelson Ahlberg


In a simple span of a few hours, I have had two lessons in loss. I learned about an exquisite moth in Tokyo who emerged to eyes of wonder near a family's dwelling. Within this same delicate time span, a grandmother died.

The moth's wings are wide, nearly white with a hint of green, and delicate with a fragility which makes you want to protect it in plastic. But it was real; it was wonderful and open to the features within life that could also destroy such beauty in a godly heartbeat.

One moment the moth could be seen and admired with a wingspan that can measure four inches in width. The next moment only parts of it could be found. How cruel it seems for a life cycle to end as quickly as one has kissed the sun. Perhaps one of it's natural predators sought out this beautiful moth.

And within this same delicate time span, a grandmother died. I was stunned to learn of this passing. I wept. I didn't know the moth having seen it through photos continents away. But now I'm seeking to know it. I am seeking to appreciate it as I am learning about such a vision.

I did know the Grandmother. I knew her name. I saw and talked to her in recent years. I read poetry to her. I knew little things about her which made her endearing. God knows she was enduring. I had a sense of her spirit as I've been in her presence. I enjoyed my times with her. I knew she was loved and watched over by her family. In a most recent photo, her granddaughter and new husband leaned over her in rapt joy as she held the bride's bouquet as she sat in her wheelchair. I love this photo.

Now her wings are wide, white, and delicate. And she lives on in many hearts in their memory forever; but also she exists in a new home, loved and watched over by an Eternal God

Actias luna showing wing span

              

Grandma Alice Paul with her granddaughter,
 Elizabeth Doerr, and her husband, Brad Doerr

Connie Nelson Ahlberg

All Rights Reserved.

All Passes Away

Thich Nhat Hanh in Viet Nam

Renunciation is not getting rid of the things of this world,

but accepting that they pass away.  Aitken Roshi

Prayer of Letting Go

If life is a lesson

In letting go;

May my life then, Lord,

As water,

Through my fingers flow.

Connie Nelson Ahlberg

The greatest achievement is selflessness.
The greatest worth is self-mastery.
The greatest quality is seeking to serve others.
The greatest precept is continual awareness.
The greatest medicine is the emptiness of everything.
The greatest action is not conforming with the worlds ways.
The greatest magic is transmuting the passions.
The greatest generosity is non-attachment.
The greatest goodness is a peaceful mind.
The greatest patience is humility.
The greatest effort is not concerned with results.
The greatest meditation is a mind that lets go.
The greatest wisdom is seeing through appearances.
Atisha